Tuesday, January 12, 2010

What have we done?

The Farm at Eymet – Arrive Friday, Dec. 31st, 2009

Every day is a challenge and has been kind of stressful. In fact, I have doubts almost every day about what we are doing here. Sometimes I feel so displaced and the simplest thing, (like going grocery shopping) can stress me out. Getting our bank account at Bank Popularie was quite an accomplishment, although the kind woman who helped us did speak English. When we tried to get our phones now that we had the treasured “RIB” so a monthly payment can be deducted from our bank account, we actually delved into our limited French as the sales woman did not speak any English. While waiting in line, I felt like I was going to get sick though. This was just too much for one day. But when it went well and we learned what our next steps were (we have to wait for our bank card to arrive), I felt much better. But, back to the doubts. I have them a lot and I think the fact that I’m having those thoughts is stressing me out. This is everything I wanted, right? I’m not working at DDB in my stressful position as BBD. I’m not commuting in LA, sitting in traffic half of my life. But, those are “my issues” and I understand them and can deal with them. I feel so utterly “foreign” and out of place right now. Even though everyone has been incredibly kind and helpful. Caleigh started school this week and I have been working on filling out her paperwork for the past few days. She is doing great and I just left a message for someone who might be able to tutor in French. Everyone loves her at the school. The boys whistle at her and call her a “sex bomb” and all want to date her. Luckily she has girlfriends instead.

I have also received emails almost every day from our tenants back home and it looks like we will be putting in new hardwood floors in the office since the cats/dogs seemed to have destroyed the carpet. They are not even being pains; it’s our frickin’ animals who went crazy the 2 weeks after we left and our house sitter must not have noticed ). Anyway, dealing with that, Verizon over billing, bills in general, our spending, etc., from afar is completely taking its toll on me.

What I am hoping is that this will be the most difficult part of our adventure and I will look back and read this and laugh and wonder what I was thinking. For now, the reality of moving to france for 3-6 months is not picture perfect. Am I glad we did this? Yes. I’m very proud of that. Will I make it past next week? God I hope so.

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